I blame it all on my mom. She rocks!
I’m not trying to start blogger beef. I want to put that out there now, because, really, I’m a little fish in a big pond. I just want to address some misconceptions about my most recent post.
So I peeped a blog post commenting on my Girl Power Session article that said that this:
And because she refuses to acknowledge that there is a high statistical probability that people will marginalize her because of her gender and her race, she won’t recognize when it happens to her. And she won’t have the tools and skills to counteract those artificial barriers.
That made me a little sad, because really, ha ha, you have NO idea! Let me tell you a little story:
My whole life has been about breaking barriers. That’s why I’m into social media in the first place, because I want to find ways to break the barriers that society sets in terms of class, gender and race, using technology. Let’s just list a few walls I’ve had to break down in life:
- Being black.
- Being poor.
- Being a woman.
- Being raised by a single mother.
- Being a year younger than everyone in my school because I skipped a grade.
- Choosing to major in digital media in college, which was the most “oppressed” of all of the educational communities on my campus.
- Being outspoken.
- Being a part of the LGBT community.
These are just the only ones that I can think of. And I’m not trying to toot my own horn in any way, you know? Because I’m sure that we’ve all come against some stuff in our lifetimes.
I looked up the word “oppressed” in the dictionary. Every meaning involves the idea of “wearing down on” or “burdening”. I think that that’s the difference. I refuse to carry the prejudices and injustices that other people try to put on me.
I do agree that a good deal of this is a cultural thing. Culture plays so much into how women look at themselves and how they live their lives in relation to men. Raised by a single mom in a situation where my dad wanted nothing to do with me at the time, I was always told that I am equal to any man and that I cannot let any person, man or woman, hold me back from what I want to do. Men have never been above me. Even if they are my boss or my superior, really, they rely on me in some way for something, and I’m not talking about nookie ::wink::
I dunno. I kinda got off on a rant and lost focus. I’m just curious about what factors lead some women to become ballsy and others to look at life through “I’m not good enough because I’m a woman”-colored glasses.
Oh, and before I forget: “What is sexy?” Must address that.
Sexy…so when I said that “self-hate isn’t sexy”, I meant that it is not emotionally or mentally attractive to downplay traits that make you who you are and call them hindrances. I’m a plus-sized, geeky black woman with a Southern accent who enjoys wearing ties and a dog chain…and those are all strengths! I think back to what one of the women said at the end of the Girl Power session. She said something like “It’s inside of all women to be strong.” I toally agree with that. Let’s look at this through positives:
Strenght = sexy
Inner power = sexy
Self-love = sexy
And I don’t mean sexy in the media-hyped way. I mean sexy in the “I know that I’m the hottness and it’s got nothing to do with how I look” way.
I’ll end with this. I’ll give you all a hint into how I view guys who really think that I’m going to lie down and be a professional stepstool or doormat. This is a line from Godsmack’s “The Enemy”.
…and I know everybody knows you try to be like me
but even at your best as a man you couldn’t equal half of me.
Trust me, I have the tools. They’re all inside of me. And around me. My social network rocks!